Comment Section for How to Be Less Self-Critical When Perfectionism Is a Trap - The New York Times

This New York Times article discusses the rising trend of perfectionism among young people and offers advice on how to mitigate self-criticism. The article highlights that perfectionism is not about excelling in pursuits but about never feeling good enough or adequate, leading to harsh self-criticism. It references a study led by Thomas Curran, an associate professor of psychology at the London School of Economics, that found an increase in socially prescribed perfectionism, where individuals believe others expect them to be perfect. Various factors such as parental expectations, school pressures, and social media could be responsible for this rise. The article suggests several ways to handle self-criticism. It presents the concept of 'distancing' from Ethan Kross, a professor of psychology at the University of Michigan, which encourages individuals to step back and observe their negative thoughts from a detached perspective. This can involve imagining how one will feel about a situation in the future or using third-person language when thinking about upsetting events. The article also recommends accepting what's 'good enough' instead of striving for perfection. This approach involves letting go of the constant need for improvement and focusing on activities that bring joy and purpose. Lastly, practicing self-compassion is also advised. Perfectionism is often a protective strategy to feel less vulnerable, but if it becomes burdensome, it may be time to let it go. The process might require professional help to foster internal safety and self-acceptance.